Saturday, November 24, 2012

Decorate the Tree

The activity for day two of the Christmas Countdown was to put up and decorate the tree.

Well, that looks phallic!
This is not helping the whole creepster elf image...

This is my first year with a kid who wants to help decorate the tree.  I mean, last year she wanted to help but she only wanted to help for 2 minutes and then she wanted to watch TV or whatever.  This year she wanted to put on every ornament where she wanted, which was in a little cluster at her eye level.  And I admittedly have tree issues because I need everything to match and do not allow kid ornaments or anything out of theme.

It was magical and adorable for about an hour, and then it was kind of exhausting.  How's that for good parenting?  It took us from 10 a.m. until about 5:30 p.m. to decorate this tree.

Bed head, Christmas jammas, concentration.
She also had a hot chocolate mustache.
The cuteness kills me.

In all fairness, we took a trip to buy more decorations and then go to the "pet store."  If you are looking for cheap toddler entertainment, don't forget to go to the pet supplies store.  Olivia thinks that seeing the five varieties of animals there store is about equal to going to the zoo.

I had both girls with me because Mark was watching a football game with his friends, and Adelle was a hot ass mess by the time we were ready to check out.  Which reminds me, what is up with people who freak the fuck out when a baby cries in public?  EVERYONE was looking at me, like, "are you going to do something about that?"  Um, no.  Babies cry, people.  Mama needs some pre-lit garland.  It is going to be fine.

Which also reminds me!  I was at a different store with just Adelle last week.  She was fussy and we were waiting in line to make a return.  I was totally not paying attention to her at all and was just rocking the stroller to pacify her, but apparently she was smiling at the old lady in line behind me.  This lady says to me, "honey, your baby is smiling and you are just totally missing it!"


Yes.  I should look at my baby every second of every day.  I should never do anything else just in case she might smile because otherwise I just simply do not appreciate the magic of infancy, or whatever.  So annoying.  She would shit her pants if she saw me at the playground dicking around on my iPhone while my kid plays.

(Because I go to the playground to let Olivia play so that I can have 17 minutes of peace to focus on something other than my kid.  Trust me, we see each other all the livelong day.  She wants the break as much as I do.)

But I digress.

We had a fun day over all and the house looks great.  I bought a smaller tree and pink and purple decorations that will be the kid tree, and we will put that up tomorrow.  But the living room looks sufficiently Christmassed for now!  And Olivia wanted to watch A Christmas Story four times, which I am really excited about because I love that movie.

Had to order Adelle's stocking today.
I still have to decide what day three of the Christmas countdown will be, and pick a new place for the creepster phallic elf.  Maybe I'll put him with the penis monkey!!


juliane2004 said...

Where are the stockings from? Trying to find some for us.

Trish said...

Literally laughing my ass off. I love your posts. Been reading a long time but don't comment- sorry.
I am one of those bitches in line who can't stand crying kids but hearing your side of it just made me laugh. You rock.
Trish - San Diego

boringyear said...

Last year Monkey was like 5 months old at Christmas, and didn't give a rats about the tree.

This year I suspect all the ornaments will need to be above grabbing height so only the top third of the tree will be decorated and/or the tree will have to be high up like on top of a table or something.

And then it will be kiddy-eye-level decorations plus possibly another baby to keep them out of reach of... How many years will it be before I can have a perfectly decorated tree again? Because I am with you on being obsessed about that...

Carrie said...

We're doing a countdown, too! You can steal some of my ideas if you're strapped... most are from Pinterest, of course ;)

HereWeGoAJen said...

Elizabeth sorted all the ornaments into chunks, so that all the similar ones were together. I considered it a developmental step- recognizing patterns and alike things, etc. And then I moved them all after she went to bed.

Milla said...

I love your living room and your tree looks beautiful. I can only presume that you did a fair amount of decoration relocation after the help, currently we just have about 10 ornaments on 2 branches only that my girl put up yesterday. Olivia looks so adorable and quite focussed, I hadn't thought of Xmas pjs but now I will.

Having a break sounds fine to me. I know exactly what you mean about phones and the park, for goodness sake, it's the place I've experienced more parenting disapproval than anywhere else (except Ikea on a bank holiday, not much sympathy for the parents of hysterical toddlers to be had there).

I can't keep up with all of your posts at the moment but genuine thanks for managing the time, I'm enjoying catching up. Also, you made me feel better about putting up my tree already, when everybody else I know is restrained and adult about it.x

Wiz said...

Ok, first of all, thanks for making me look like an idiot as I sit and giggle EVERY time I read one of your posts.

I was at the airport, trying to wrangle two kids (four months and three) AND get the luggage when some lady pulled that smiling shit with me! I was actually talking to my three year old son and this lady kept hitting me and saying "look, she's smiling, look!!" LADY, I am talking to my son, another little person who needs much more attention right now than my daughter who smiles all day long! What is with old people?

And we bought two trees this year. One that my son is allowed to "help" with and one he couldn't touch because I'm anal like that.