Wednesday, June 9, 2010

No New People Got to See My Lady Business.

Mah transfah was Thursday!  Mah transfah was Thursday!

It wasn't until 2:15, so we had time to go out to lunch with Olivia before we took her to the sitter.  I downed my Valium with my required 16 ounces of water at 1:15, and by 1:37 I felt like I was melting into the seat of the car.  I kept looking at the trees on the side of the highway and thinking, "The trees are moving by fast but also slow at the same time."  That's right about when I told Mark that I was feeling the Valium and also called him a pussy but I have no recollection as to why. 

Everything else was very boring for the most part. I did suffer from loud, uncontrollable hilarity when Mark put on his scrubs because the crotch area was totally puffy.  It looked like he had a FUPA something fierce.

The most notable part of the day, aside from being stuffed like a turkey with frozen embryos HOLY SCIENCE BATMAN, was the complete and total dejavuness of it all.

My transfer with Olivia was almost exactly two years ago to the day.  The weather was the same.  The same exact construction was being done on the freeway (thanks for your amazing progress ODOT).  All of the exact same people.  No new viewers of my Lady Business for the Frozen Embryo Transfer.  Same triage nurse, same transfer nurse, same ultrasound tech, same doctor, same embryologist. 

Yes, Dr. Olga did my transfer and Martie was there showing me by giant ass bladder and amazingly catching a picture of the exact moment that the embryos left the catheter and plopped into my Ute of Doom.  I was going to ask Dr. Olga if she saw Sex and the City 2, but as soon as I sat on the table she was all Let Me Into Your Vagina Plz Kthxbai and so there really wasn't time to chat. 

We transferred two blastocysts - they were frozen at day two, cleavage stage and thawed for three days, for all you hard core IVFers.   The doctor and nurses assured us that they could not be more beautiful and perfect. 

These embryos are from Olivia's cycle, so maybe she'll have a sibling that is sort of her cryo twin or whatever.  That should be fun to explain someday, can't wait!

This week has flown by.  Mostly because I am a miserable sack of complaints and nobody likes me so Mark locked me in a closet with a poop bucket and a sock taped into my mouth.  He only lets me out to give me my Progesterone shots (1.5 inches in the ass, baby!  Bring it!), which he throws like darts at my enormous dimpled ass.

My beta is a week from tomorrow.  I'm surprisingly relaxed this time around.  As a matter of fact, I'm so relaxed that I bet I'll get pregnant from the FET and from the sheer relaxation.  My uterus is probably all, "I'm so relaxed I think I'll spontaneously reproduce, no sex necessary."   

The possibility of no siblings seems a lot less daunting than the possibility of no kids ever.  Perhaps I will eat these words later (I'm putting them in Tupperware right now so that they stay fresh!) but I don't see me being devastated if this fails. 

I'll be more pissed that my ass is all sore for nothing.  The Progesterone in Oil is SO MUCH WORSE this time you guys.  The shot I got Monday night got a bump on the skin with a giant welt underneath and it hurts to have underwear touching the skin.  So I've been Porky Pigging it for work.

HA!  I kid.

One Year Ago: The Happiest Baby On The Block
Two Years Ago:  My Neuroses: Let Me Show You It


Adam and Julia said...

I LOVE it! What a fantastic attitude you have. I always love it when someone new takes a look at my lady business. I am always thinking if I am groomed appropriately or not. Are they judging me? And then the drugs take hold and I don't give a crap!! My fingers are crossed for your cryo twins! Stay relaxed. I would say have a glass of wine, but it will be at least ten months before that can happen...hopefully!

Stephanie said...

I am just learning so many new words! Thanks, Jen!

Maybe Jenepper Version 2.0 will be an Olivia twin born on Olivia's 2nd birthday. Olivia's very own mini-Me.

That would be awesome (but really, can that actually happen??)!!!

Good luck with everything!

areyoukiddingme said...

What you mean to say is that Mark locked you in a closet with the Urban Dictionary...That was kind of him, but I'm sure he'll look back fondly on the time when all you could think to call him was pussy.

Much luck with your FET. I hope Olivia gets a lovely brother or sister to beat up! She's surely bored with running her parents' lives by now.

Calliope said...

very happy that things went so smoothly, chica! (& wooo on the kick ass sounding embryos!)

HereWeGoAJen said...

Obviously, Olivia's cycle was an awesome cycle, so I hope this one sticks because that would be awesome. (Too many awesomes in one sentence? Too bad, I am leaving it.)

I've got my fingers crossed. In a relaxed way, of course.

Alyssa said...

Are you going to take an HPT before your beta? If your transfer was last Thursday, how many "DPO" does that put you at (frozen at 2 days + transfer 6 days ago = 8 DPO?)

Jen said...

Alyssa - I was thinking I'm 11 dpo?
Retrieval is ovulation
+2 days to get to cleavage before freeze
+3 day thaw to blast before transfer
+6 days since transfer

You bet your sweet ass I'll test before my beta. :)

PJ said...

I got my positive pee stick at 11dpo. Just sayin...

I still have the positive 11dpo pee stick. As if the 10 ton belly with hiccuping babies isn't enough?

OLGA!!!! Ahaha! I remember her fondly. Well... from your posts, of course.

Those PIO lumps are the worst. Some people say if you ice the spot beforehand it helps to stop them, but I was always too lazy to do that.

Good luck!

Carrie said...

Oh my gosh. Still laughing. Thanks for putting up your protocol last week too (though I missed it until now, don't know how that happened).

We'll be doing a FET this fall/winter, and it's interesting to see that they didn't put you on Lupron this time around. Any idea on why that is? I would love to avoid the Lupron, but it's on my protocol. Bleh. Everything else looks about the same, except they are doing some patches too (not sure if it's more estrogen or a different type maybe). Who knows! Also, did you only have to thaw two embryos? We lost two (of four) when we thawed last time. Just wondering if yours all made it.

Love reading. Wishing you the best!

Jen said...

Carrie - good luck with your FET!

Cleveland Clinic totally changed their FET Protocol. No more Lupron, and no patches. Instead of a month of preparation before you can even cycle, you can start on CD1 and have your transfer CD20. They do requre PIO, though, and do not recommend suppositories.

The nurse I talked to said that they are seeing better FET success rates this way. They have not changed their fresh protocol.

'Murgdan' said...

Seriously on the relaxing part. The FET was so much easier on me personally...hope relaxing = success.

This seems totally more low key for you, blogwise at least. Maybe just less mind/heart/emotions-consuming than the first time around?

Can't wait to see the pee stick...

kimbosue said...

You are full of funny urban dictionary quotes today...oh and frozen embies!

Best of luck to ya!

Shila said...

Good Luck next week!

Mrs. Higrens said...

No new lady biznahs peepers? How cool is that?

Also, no catheter for you this time...that's awesome!

I'm here in the middle of 29 weeks along wonder why anyone would want to go through this again, so thanks for the inspiration of cute Olivia photo's (in earlier posts).

Go cryo-twins go!

Mrs. B said...

So glad to hear everything went well, Jen! Lots of luck to you, and I give you SO much credit. I'm having a rough time and I'm only on my (almost) 8th cycle TTC. I can't imagine the mess I'll be if I get to the IVF stage! Ha!

*fingers crossed* for a +HPT and beta soon!! :)

Kahla said...

You know you're not kidding and that's totally OK. I agree, PIO gets worse every time you do it. Five fresh cycles for us and by that fifth cycle I think my arse was one big whelp. Good luck!

rebecca said...

Ha, ha you are so freaking hilarious & at the same time educational on urban it! So glad things went well today with the transfer & you have an amazing outlook on things. Hoping you get a BFP next week:)

jen said...

OH my. So many new words. FUPA and Porky Pigging it..WOW.

I KNEW there had to be a name for people with fatty privates-finding out there is, was like Christmas in June over here.

Also- I Porky Pig it all the time and I'm not ashamed. Nosiree.

Laura said...

you crack me up, and I love it. I am wishing you much baybay luck!

Maddy said...

How you feel about your FET - it's like you took the words right out of my head, especially "The possibility of no siblings seems a lot less daunting than the possibility of no kids ever." I feel exactly the same way. I'm on day 4 of my protocol now with my first E2 check tomorrow. I also don't have lupron in my protocol. I wish you all the best!!!

Delenn said...

Wishing you the best of luck!

Jayna said...

I find this amazing!!! I did my first IVF cycle with Abby two years ago, and we just completed our second cycle! I just got my BFP!! Good Luck to you!!!

Alyssa said...

You know why I love your blog? Because it is EDUCATIONAL. You should get government grants for all the knowledge you've dropped on my ass. Not about the fertility treatments, mind you, but because I now know all about porky pigging. And the world is a better place.
On the realz (because I. Am. Urban.) I hope this goes really well for you, Mark, and Olivia. And the embryos. And the entire staff at the fertility center. And the cast of Rent.

Crossed Fingers said...

I hope the FET works and you get the BFP you want by "just relaxing" this time around. hahaha. Seriously though, best of luck and keeping my fingers crossed for your beta!

Anonymous said...

Jenn. I haven't commented in a while but we were IVF soul mates last time, I think you were just one week ahead of me, I loved reading your blog because it prepared me for what camed next. I haven't been reading (too busy w/ baby and job) since the babies were a few months old but I just logged in to see how you were doing, and that is so GREAT you just had a transfer! I think you will get pregnant b/c we are soul sisters and I just found out I'm 6 weeks with #2. So you're definitely preggers. :-) Best wishes to you and if you ever feel like getting in touch, I'm at Take care,


Aimee said...


Did you get pregnant on your own with #2? Or did you need help? (i'm just curious)

Jenn...good luck this week!! I'm anxious for you.

I have the pleasure of going through IVF #2 in the upcoming months while my brother-in-law is living with us. I'm a lucky girl.

cowgirltn said...

Sticky vibes are on their way.

Christine said...

Because we both hate it... baby dust!!!!!

Hahaha, no, but seriously, I hope everything is going well!

Maggie said...

Tick Tock - have you taken a HPT yet??????

Fingers crossed,

Carrie said...

Jen, thanks for letting me know... I will chat with my RE about it. I'm still nursing, so I'll be happier to be on less meds, even though they are really just the same as birth control pills.

ALSO! CONGRATS on the BFP! I'm ridiculously excited for you, and I'm thinking high thoughts for your beta.