Monday, August 24, 2009

6 Months: Holy Crap

It seems that I forgot to do a five month post.

I've been busy. You know, enjoying Olivia, of course. And other stuff. Like maybe developing a giant crush on a reality TV contestant? Or not. I'm just throwing things out there.

(Is Mark jealous?

But anyway, mah baybee is SIX MONTHS OLD! Six! Months!

Every day she does something new and adorable. And really? Even if I want to be in a bad mood? I can't. She makes me happy.

In the interest of getting this post done already, GAHD I've been trying to write it for a week, here is a random list of stuff that I never want to forget about Olivia right now:

- When she is tired, she plays with her right ear. Before bed, we rock in her chair with a bottle, and she plays with her ear while she eats. When she's done, she does a giant "I'm over it" sigh and puts her left arm over her eyes. EVERY NIGHT.

- She totally knows her name. I'm not sure when this really happened, but if you say it, she whips her head around and is all, what? I'm playing mom leave me alone!

- Repetition cracks her ass up. (heh...that's a stupid sentence. But I'm leaving it.)

- When she is excited or mad, she kicks her legs. If I am holding her, it looks like she is trying to run. On weeknights, when Mark gets home, she smiles and kicks her legs.

- My mom taught her to fake cough. She coughs and gives you the flirt eye. If you cough, she does a giant smile. This is so cute to me. Except last week the sitter called to tell me that Olivia had a bit of a maybe it's not cute to everyone.

- She goes to sleep so easily. We put her down awake with her blanket, and she talks herself to sleep. What a difference a month makes in the sleep department!

- She wants to be everywhere except where she is. She will fling her body in the general direction of anything that sparks her interest. She's either curious or has a death wish.

- Stranger danger has set in. She seems to be OK if someone is holding her when we are NOT around. But if she can see us, she lasts about 30 seconds before doing a giant pout face and starting a very dramatic Woe Is Me cry.

- She is a total drama queen when she cries. First, big pout lip. Then, noises of dismay - usually "ahgeeeee...geeee...aaaaageeeee....WAAAHHH!" See Exhibit A:

Pout Lip: Pick Me Up or Pay the Consequences.

In her defense, that fake grass was ridiculous.

We took her for her 6 month photos over the weekend. I could post a bazillion, but here's a few:

I always thought fake scenery was tacky. Until you put Mah Baybee in front of it. Then it's just: AWE! MAH BAYBEE AT THA BEEEEEECH!

(this was about 2 seconds before she tried to eat that entire prop in one NOM.)

As promised, a poop story...

We went to visit a friend who just had a smooshy little baybee boy. Olivia was on her best behavior, even after we got lost and ended up being in the car for 2 hours. Took a nap in a strange crib, entertained herself while we talked. It was great.

She was eating her last bottle before hitting the road, and she did the Grunts of Doom - poop for sure. So I picked her up and took my perfectly well behaved baybee over to the pack and play.

And then Someone says, "Is that what I think it is?"

And I turn around and see that one of the dogs has shit on the floor. EW! GAG! GROSSAROO!

And then Someone says, "Did the baby shit on the floor?"

And I'm all NOOOO! Not mah baybee! While I look disdainfully at the dogs, trying to pass of their shit for mah baybee's shit. Stoopid dogs.

Then I go to take off Olivia's shorts.



I shit you not, it looked exactly like this:

And then I died from embarrassment. I died and I'm writing this from beyond the grave. Mah baybee shat on someones floor.

But at least she is cute.

It wuz the dog, I swearz.


You can still win! I will pick the winner tomorrow!


andrea said...

i feel like this could only happen to me, gld i'm wrong ;)

love the new pictues

Roz said...

I have to day... I've been a lurker on your blog for a while, but I love it! I love your list on what you want to remember about Olivia and I think the poo story is hilarious!!

Mrs. Higrens said...

Love, love, love the pink blanket picture. Totally squishy awe over here.

Amy said...

LOL! Lexi has already shat on someone! And I love the ad at the bottom of your page "Stop Your Dog Eating Poop!" LOL

uncomplicateme said...

I don't know how time is going so fast, but it's sucks and is exciting equally.

The fake grass cracks me up... it looks like an aerial photo taken from a helicopter 500 feet above the ground. Then they put the photo on the floor and make unassuming children lay on it because it's green and grass-ish. :) But the baybeeeee is so cute you don't even notice the grass.

I love the poop story. I have nothing that exciting so far. :) KNOCK ON WOOD.

renee said...

ohmigosh i laughed so hard through the whole "mah baybeh shat on someones floor" story. i know i would definitely try to pass it off as the dogs too. lmao. oh and happy half a year to olivia :D

LutherLiz said...

mah baybeh shat on grandma. I think it is a rite of passage!

I'm addicted to BB too.

KLTTX said...

She is too cute.

That poop story is hyterical!!!

Nerwal said...

Hilarious story. Cutest baby. And I heart Jeff as well.

K. said...

I love Jeff too. could this post become the I love Jeff post?

Erin said...

Awww... your list of cute Olivia things is so speshal! My Chase does the whole arm over the eyes trick too. LOVE IT!

So, was the 2nd trip to the photographer's as bad as the first trip? She's totally starting to look EXACTLY like you too. Just in case you had any doubts.

YAY for the drawing tomorrow!

Sarah said...

That reminds me of the first time I took my little stinker down out to dinner with my parents. I took him to the bathroom to change his filthy mess of a diaper, and when I came back out (wearing THE CUTEST black skirt and striped top) my mom commented that I had something on my skirt. "Oh, it's just some guacamole" Not guacamole. One month old baby shat. Be prepared - that stuff can escape from even the best of diapers.

Parsing Nonsense said...

Cute baby pictures! Good thing she was in the mood to ham it up for the camera, you never do know what you're gonna get with kids.

Six months, though? Are you sure?! That went by SO FAST!

Rotten said...

Well at least it was on the floor. I took my well behaved 5 month old to a friends house to visit with her new son and she pooped on my friend's couch. FUN!

KimboSue said...

That is hilarious shit! Pun intended. I was laughing out loud. Work peeps are asking what all the craziness is about in my cubicle!

And OMG at the little nomable footsie up in the air at the BEEEEEECH. Perfect!@

Aunt Becky said...

No, dude. That was ME that pooed on your floor. You're welcome. You should frame it.

Courtney said...

I think the picture in the pink blanket is my favorite, but they're all fab. What a great poop story, totally worth the wait.

Rambler said...

OMG, that picture of King Poop is terrible, I have to avert my eyes as I scroll through looking for cute baby pictures.

And the story itself though...LMFAO. Shouldn't have been reading this while in the middle of my conference call...

Mel said...

LM had a blow out in the jumperoo a few weeks ago. She was just happily bouncing and then I heard her stop for a minute and make a few grunting noises and then she kicked right back up... I came to sit by her and saw this huge stain on the carpet underneath her, poop all over her leg, the jumperoo seat. It was awesome. I had so much fun cleaning that one up.

Dana said...

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha she told me about this story today at lunch. CLASSIC!!!!!!!

A New Beginning said...

I love the pictures. They are adorable. Especially the first one with her hand under her chin. So cute!

battynurse said...

Pretty funny about the poo on the floor. Those pics are great too.

Ashley said...

I love the pink blanket picture... adorable! And the poop story... I am still laughing my butt off about :)

InfertileNaomi said...

Cute baby pictures.

Shanny said...

Olivia looks so darn cute!!!!

::Giggling at the poop story::

Shauna said...

so funny.......
i haven't had the poop spillage from the diapers yet....but definately the #1 leakage is a problem......I wish they made a "nightime" diaper for the baybee's......not just the bigger kids. oh well.....
cute pics and funny post!
i especially love the one in the pink blankie

natalie said...

ahh! Are you kidding me with the cuteness?? She is so adorable!

pregnantpause said...

I am laughing so hard right now about the shit on the floor, my husband is looking at me like I'm crazy! My daughter never shit on the floor, but everytime I put her in the tub until she was 2 she would float a big poop!

April said...

But I bet YOU had wipes to deal with that disastrous-ness, which puts you one ahead of me.