Tuesday, April 29, 2008


As we know, last week I had to fight with my favorite nurse Sally to do another fresh cycle. It was not that bad, because I'm good at fighting and can usually end up getting my way. So when we left off, Sally was going to call and order me my injectibles. I fully realize that ordering injectibles through my insurance is a royal pain in the ass, and when I get involved, I am always glad that it's not my job to handle it from the beginning because GAWD! Just send the drugs, people! They are not fun, high inducing drugs! They suck ass, so don't worry…I won't sell them to elementary school kids!

Yesterday, on my lunch break (totally on my lunch break, and not during work, at all….) I called the specialty company that handles the drugs for the fertility-challenged. Just to check and make sure my order was in the works. Because I'm not sure if you realized? But I start project sleepy time Lupron on SUNDAY! So I need my drugs, preferably by Friday. And nobody has called and asked for my $100 copay (yes, am lucky) so I figure they haven't even processed my order yet.

I call and am annoyed immediately:

Jen: Hello random lady, I am doing IVF and would like to check the status of my injectible order.

Random Lady: OK, sure, let me just check… *click, click, click * I see that the meds were shipped to you at the end of February. Did you not get them?

Jen: Yes, I got those ones…?

Random Lady: Great! Is there anything else I can assist you with today?

Jen: Yes. I have a new order. I need to check the status of that order. Not from February. From now. Like, last week. For use this coming Sunday…? Is any of this ringing a bell….?

Random Lady: Already?!

Jen: Um, yes, asshole. My IVF failed. Am doing another. Status? Murder? Rage?

Random Lady: Really? Another IVF already? That's so soon!

Jen: Sally? Is that you?

Random Lady: Usually they aren't so close together! Well, let me just check to see if there is a new order… *click, click, click…. *

Jen: Don't bother. I just gouged out both of my eyes, and now I am going to throw myself down the stairs…

Random Lady: Oh, I see. Yes, you are doing another IVF.

Jen: Really? Great. Thank you for confirming, because I wasn't sure. But now I am. You should get a raise and maybe free dinner.

Random Lady: The order is loading now…so you really want to do another IVF so soon? It's really hard on your body, you know.

Jen: Yes, I know. I love putting my body through unnecessary, painful processes. After this phone call? I'm going to sneak down to the bathroom and self-flagellate in one of the bathroom stalls.


So seriously, this phone call was really annoying, but I was nice to Random Lady, and today I did get a phone call to confirm my order. The only problem is that Novidrel is backordered for an indefinite amount of time. Which is stupid! MY GOSH! So I had to get Sally on the job again (she is awesome, seriously. I love her) and she ordered me Ovidrel instead. What is the difference? Who the hell knows?!

My big box of drugs will be coming on May 1st, and you know I'll be taking pictures again. Because I am that much of a loser.

I must also give my most sincere apologies for my sucky blog commenting. School is kicking my ass, and it's ALMOST over – next week is finals! So I'll be a way better random internet friend after next week.




the Babychaser: said...

Good luck with your finals, and with your Lupron, of course.

This will be the shortest comment I've ever left. Even with this addendum.

alicia said...

haha! Great convo! Such a hassle this whole infertility crap is! Glad your drugs are coming though. Good luck with school!

Meghan said...

Just found your blog through the redbook one. Your writing here absolutely cracks me up. Best of luck with this IVF (and with your moron management)

BB and MTB said...

Nice to know the lady at the specialty drug pharmacy is looking out for you. Geez - can't wait to hear what the FedEx guy says.

Emily said...

So "nice" that Random Lady is looking out for your best interest, says me sarcastically of course.

If you really want some lupron ... I've got some for you!! :-P

PJ said...

OMFG! That's too funny! Is it Random Lady's first day on the job or is she just an insensitive boob? geez!

Ovidrel is awesome, because it is prefilled! As in, take off cap and insert into stomach.

And seriously, IVF nurses must have amazing patience, because I KNOW I am a pain in the ass, and just... can you imagine?

Denise said...

Why can't people just do their jobs without giving you unsolicited advice when it is clearly none of their business? What an idiot.

Lost in Space said...

Clearly, taking fertility med orders gives her special permission to have some input on your IVF cycle. Must be Sally's evil twin.

Mrs. Higrens said...

Moron management indeed.

Good luck with finals. And getting everything in time. With or without comments from the FedEx guy (love that comment bb!).

NEO Jill said...

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to live in your head..... :)

Good luck on your finals!

annacyclopedia said...

How absurd that you had to have that conversation with her! I truly can't believe the audacity of some people - why does she think she has the right to make any comments on your treatment?

Good luck with everything!

Ahuva Batya said...

Ok, I'm totally not the "write an angry letter" type of person, but I really think you should email someone in that company about the sensitivity (or lack thereof) of their workers. That was so outrageous.

Happy May Day. Enjoy the May Basket that shows up at your door, and I truly hope it's the last one.

jac said...

stupid don't make infertility any better! i mean seriously. maybe she needs some meds too! jerk!

way to go on the ivf again! can't wait to see/read about the results!

crossing my fingers for ya girl!

MamaSoon said...

OK. I just started reading your blog and you are one funny chick. Love your style. I'll be back for more soon. If you check mine out, you'll find some sad ass post but normally i am more positive and powerful. Anyhow, good luck with the lupron.

Oksana said...

I am in so much pain I forgot why I even posted the previous comment - my point was it's awesome Redbook picked you and it is well deserved... (sob, ouch!)